Hate your job? If you're thinking about leaving and wondering:
- What should I do first?
- How can my network help?
- When should I tell my boss?
As I wrote in my last post, I learned some very powerful lessons from the life-changing experience of caring for my dying father and I wanted to share some of them here.
I admit it's an exercise that's equal parts (1) grief therapy, (2) creative tune-up, and (3) compulsive teaching (I'm always looking for ways to connect the dots through story and example).
But it's also an exercise that comes from the heart. Caring for my father opened a doorway to my heart and now it wants to be more involved in everything I do.
Over the past few weeks, as I've been paying more attention to what my heart has to say, it's telling me that after a long dry spell, it's time to get back to writing. Even if I still don't feel like it, I know it's right, so here I am.
I found that listening to my heart is actually a good thing. Like many entrepreneurs, I spend a lot of time in my head. Thinking about strategy, planning next steps, tracking my progress, and making adjustments. Do you do the same thing?
Even though most experts say we make decisions emotionally, then try to back into the logic, I believe that the inner voice I hear in my decision-making most of the time still comes from my head. Why do I think so? Because when I specifically ask my heart for advice, it sounds and feels very different from what I'm used to.
I did some work a few weeks ago with Randall Krause, a colleague of mine who runs Hym-la (Himalayan Yoga Meditation Society of Los Angeles). Over the phone he took me through an amazingly simple but powerful exercise for directly asking my heart for advice on an issue I was struggling with (or rather, my head was struggling with).
Within minutes, an answer came to me that I hadn't thought of, yet felt really good to both my heart AND my head. Confusion gone, ready to move forward.
When your heart is engaged, you can often get a more complete picture of what you need to do. It's like getting a second opinion from someone who can evaluate the situation through another perspective.
What areas in your business are you struggling with right now? What are you confused and feeling stuck about? What decisions are you holding back from making?
Take the situation out of your head for a moment and ask your heart to chime in. It might seem strange to think your heart could have an opinion about your business, but if you're stuck, what's the harm in asking? It's no different really than phoning a friend or business contact for advice, then listening to what they have to say. And because your heart wants the best for you, you might get some really interesting and relevant answers.
You may have to put yourself in a different environment (outside in nature, for example) and/or get help from a coach or teacher to connect with your heart. But there isn't any real magic to it except the true willingness to do so. Be patient, be still and wait for the answers to come.
So it's been more than 4 months since my last blog entry and I thought I owed you an explanation. I've gotten several emails from people wanting to know if I was okay. Had I abandoned the Smart Networking blog? Had I gone into witness protection? What was going on? Well, here's the story...
Where I've Been
In April my father was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer. He had never smoked, but according to Uniting Against Lung Cancer, 10-15% of cases occur in "never smokers." And because no reliable early detection mechanisms have been developed - unlike mammograms or colonoscopies - the mortality rate is higher than any other cancer.
With no options except chemotherapy, and with a very small chance it would reverse the disease anyway, and knowing how excruciating it had been for my mother who passed away in 1995, my father declined treatment and chose to live out his remaining time - the doctors said six months -- at home under hospice care.
It took me a while, but as soon as I could delegate, fulfill, or put on hold all of my business obligations, I flew to San Francisco in May to take care of him full-time. I knew there wasn't much I could do except keep him comfortable, but it was important for me to do SOMETHING.
I am so blessed to have a spouse who fully supported my decision. While I was away, we spoke every night, texted all the time, and saw each other every other weekend when he made the cross-country trip to be with us. The hospice chaplain said I was an angel for my father. Well, my husband Chris was definitely an angel for me.
I was prepared to be in California for the whole summer, expecting a slow and steady decline, but nothing I couldn't manage. Before I left home, I even suggested to one of my Platinum Level coaching clients that we could meet out there for her one-day intensive session, which appealed to her since she had never been to San Francisco.
What I wasn't prepared for was my father's rapid deterioration, and the accompanying physical, emotional and mental toll it would take to be a primary caregiver in such a dire situation. When he passed away the day after Father's Day, just two months after the diagnosis, not six, I was too exhausted and still had too much to do to really grieve.
It wasn't until a week later, when I was back home in Delaware, that all the emotions hit. A piece of music, a thought, an image (like the one on the right of him carrying me as a baby that I found in an old album) would trigger a rush of tears. It was obvious I needed to devote some time to my own healing.
But I also felt compelled to figure out where I go from here. I felt forever changed by this experience and it just didn't feel right emotionally or intellectually to simply jump back in and pick everything up where I had left it in May. I had discovered gifts I never knew about and I wanted to re-examine what I had been prioritizing in my life.
For example, some things I made time for because I had a deadline even though I felt no joy in doing them. While other things I was more passionate about I tended to push off or neglect altogether because of lack of time, and lack of urgency (i.e., no deadline). That's a totally upside down way to live!
Where I'm Going From Here
So that's why I've been laying low here on the blog and on my email newsletter these past few months. I did remain active on Facebook as I found it escapist and therapeutic to interact with my online friends, even for just a few minutes each day.
After thinking through a lot, I've put some goals on paper for the coming months, and while I haven't figured out everything I want to do or how everything fits, I feel I've gotten back on the path at a really good spot. One I can feel totally happy about as I look ahead.
Some things in my business I'll be re-starting, some things I'll be dropping, some things I'll be changing up, and some new things I'll be creating.
I learned many lessons both during the experience and in the aftermath that I am bursting at the seams to share in the hopes of helping those wanting to leap to the next stage of their business and personal growth find their strength, their motivation and most of all, their truth.
Stay tuned...
You will learn:
Oh....that dreaded question; the one we know they ALWAYS ask. Why do we find this question so tough to answer? Many people really trip on on answering this question.
A couple of ideas:
Learn to answer this question with CONFIDENCE. It WILL be asked sometime during the interview process. PRACTICE your answer -- ask others for feedback. Be prepared for this question and you'll do a MUCH better job of addressing it.
Original post on Career Success! Partners
Author:
Andy Robinson (@AndyInNaples) is a leading authority on career success and 15-year career coaching veteran whose passion in business life is "helping people love what they do for a living and achieve incredible career success." Andy is CEO of CRG Leadership Institute and co-host of Career Success Radio Show.
We're in a whole new world of employment -- one that has continued (and will continue) to evolve and one that is MUCH different from the employment world of our parents and grand-parents. The days of joining a company that you stay at and retire from are LONG GONE and will likely never return again. Job changes occur more and more frequently and career changes are more common than ever before.
We are no longer "Who we work for." Tagging your identity strictly to a company and "co-branding" your work-life with a company name are strategies that have less meaning and are impossible to sustain as a PRIMARY means of your identification. Companies come and go through mergers and dissolution -- even BIG names lose their "wow" factor and brand identity .... think of names like Enron, Arthur Andersen, NationsBank, Eastern Airlines, and countless small and mid-sized businesses.
The better strategy and one that we all must embrace if we're going to enjoy lasting career success is to firmly establish our Personal Brand. We have much more control over our own Personal Brand, and it's the "thing" that stays with us regardless of where we're "physically" employed or who we work for.
Our Personal Brand reminds people "who WE are," it becomes "what WE are known for," and it represents the "market" perception of our value proposition and personal competitive advantage. A highly effective Personal Branding Program is key to continuously communicating our Personal Brand "to the world" and constantly "pinging" our contact network with highly useful content that reminds them of who we are.
So, what are some of the key benefits of a compelling Personal Brand -- i.e., exactly what does it do for us? A compelling Personal Brand is a HUGE BENEFIT -- without question. Consider the following indicators of a Powerful Personal Brand:
IMPORTANT NOTE: You do NOT have to be a "CELEBRITY" to achieve the above, but you DO have to put conscious thought and EFFORT into the process of developing and communicating a compelling Personal Brand. It's up to you to CREATE THE PERCEPTION in the marketplace of what you WANT to be known for and what you represent.
Personal Branding is a PROCESS, an ongoing process .... and IT WORKS MAGIC for you if you do it with passion and sincerity. MAKE IT HAPPEN .... Start TODAY.
Original post on Career Success! Partners
Author:
Andy Robinson (@AndyInNaples) is a leading authority on career success and 15-year career coaching veteran whose passion in business life is "helping people love what they do for a living and achieve incredible career success." Andy is CEO of CRG Leadership Institute and co-host of Career Success Radio Show.
By Kathleen Gage
[Note: Keynote speaker, business advisor and Internet marketing expert Kathleen Gage is today's Guest Blogger on Smart Networking. She'll be here all day, Wednesday, February 17th to respond to your comments and questions on her post. Join in the fun!]
If you've been around the Internet for any length of time, you have likely heard you can make money through Joint Venture partnerships and affiliate programs. You may already be doing so, but not at the level you know is possible.
Without a doubt, partnering with the right people increases your market reach, credibility and revenue stream. It's a great way to do business. Unfortunately, many people attempt to do so without really understanding how to gain the greatest benefit for all concerned.
There are numerous types of affiliate and joint venture partner arrangements and relationships. There are those where as an affiliate you simply search out products and services that you think your market wants or with very little interaction between the you and the affiliate. Conversely, you have those who seek out your products and services for their market, but have very little interaction with you.
There are affiliate programs where no one really knows who is behind the product, you just know you might be able to make money by selling it; whatever it may be. Usually a widget of some sort.
Then there is the type of relationship where you do know who you are dealing with and your reputation resides in the quality of products and services you bring to your market. This type of relationship is quite appealing to many entrepreneurs. You do business with the affiliate because you know them, like them and trust them.
For the purpose of this conversation, we will focus on the relationships where either you bring an expert's information to your market or they bring your expertise through products and services to their market.
One of the most important things you must do is determine how you can make the relationship a win/win/win. Win for you, win for your affiliate or JV and win for the end user - the customer.
In the context of this discussion, developing affiliate relationships takes more than simply posting something on your website or blog where people can click and immediately become and affiliate. Sure, you can occasionally find great affiliates this way, but to really optimize the potential there is much more that needs to be done.
Conversely, don't assume that simply because you think what you have to offer is the greatest thing since sliced bread affiliate marketers will too. Your job is to search out those affiliates who have a great market match for your product and/or service. This can take time, effort and money to position correctly.
The bottom line is treat your affiliates and joint venture partners how you want to be treated. With the right partnerships you can build an extremely viable revenue stream and business a lot faster than if you try to do it all on your own. In today's world of business collaboration is the way to go.
About the author
Kathleen Gage is an Internet marketing advisor who works with spiritually
aware speakers, authors, coaches and consultants who are ready to turn their
knowledge into money making products and services. Find out how you can learn
from Kathleen on how to build a successful business using the Internet through
her Street Smarts Marketing VIP Club.
I recently re-read the book, "The Power of a Positive No," written by William Ury. His book offers great advice and tips for how to say "No" with grace and effect.
In his book, William offers the following specific phrases you can use to say NO to the demands of others in a manner that is respectful and that flows naturally and sincerely:
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